Monday, February 14, 2005

safe sex

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The 'missing' pic. Read post in the comments section.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

11:54 am EET  
Blogger sissoula said...

Looks like my picture has also been removed by a blog administrator, who shall remain less faceless than nameless. The regulars, however, may remember that little St. George (in days and domains far flung from the cathedral) slaying that hapless dragon. There was even a little princess running around in the background. Where they are now is not our concern. But their connection to the subject of safe sex was meant to be revealed in a post here, before those malevolent codes and corrupt characters(!) reared their ugly heads again and just about took the whole thing down with them.

The original post was much wittier, of course, but its basis was a funny article in Harper’s Magazine called “Blue Balls for the Red States,” which included some of the teaching materials currently being used in US schools’ federally funded abstinence programs. The following tale is an example:

Deep inside every man is a knight in shining armor, ready to rescue a maiden and slay a dragon. When a man feels trusted, he is free to be the strong, protecting man he longs to be.
Imagine a knight traveling through the countryside. He hears a princess in distress and rushes gallantly to slay the dragon. The princess calls out, “I think this noose will work better!” and throws him a rope. As she tells him how to use the noose, the knight obliges her and kills the dragon. Everyone is happy, except the knight, who doesn’t feel like a hero. He is depressed and feels unsure of himself. He would have preferred to use his own sword.
The knight goes on another trip. The princess reminds him to take the noose. The knight hears another maiden in distress. He remembers how he used to feel before he met the princess; with a surge of confidence, he slays the dragon with his sword. All the townspeople rejoice, and the knight is a hero. He never returned to the princess. Instead, he lived happily ever after in the village, and eventually married the maiden, but only after making sure she knew nothing of nooses.
Moral of the story: Occasional assistance may be all right, but too much will lessen a man’s confidence or even turn him away from his princess.

Congress later criticized the programs for their inclusion of “false, misleading, or distorted information.” But I’m wondering how kids today would interpret such a cautionary tale as the above. By the end of the story, I think the noose is really a noose, but what kind of kinky-ass princess would give the knight the noose to begin with?

1:33 pm EET  

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